Life and Timing

It's been a little while since I published anything on my blog. Almost 2 weeks. Heck, its been a little while since I did pretty much anything I say that I like to do. You ever get those stretches where you just don't seem interested in the stuff that normally interests you? I don't know what it is; blaise attitude; too much mental focus on one facet of life or what.

I've been putting pressure on myself to produce at work. I'm not sure that is a formula for success as its caused me to be less enjoyable to be around and I don't seemed to have been any more productive. Well, that may not be true. I do seem to be more productive in some senses but only because some of the work I'm doing now isn't my normal fare.

Ran into someone the other day while photographing my wife and daughter at a local park. He commented on my gear and mentioned that a national business is looking for experienced photographers to shoot product shots for its catalog and websites. I followed up and found that they're wanting any time they can get and they aren't paying much at all. Now I'm conflicted. On the one hand its a paying gig (albeit not very much at all) and on the other I don't want to spend too much time shooting stuff that I don't really want to shoot.

Cons:

1. I am a programmer




• I'm paid well for my ability to focus and write problem solving code or provide solutions


• I enjoy the job I have now and would like to retire from it someday after contributing to the corporation and building up its value so that my shares of stock are worth more than they are today


• This other work just doesn't pay much of anything so the extra money wouldn't really be that much


• While I would like to put together a fashion studio where I can express myself artistically using lighting, models, props, etc this doesn't seem to substantially contribute to that goal




2. I'm a husband and father




• I only get so much time with my wife and daughter when we're all awake and interested in interacting


• I can be a righteous pain in the rear and taking on more pressure just doesn't seem worth it


• I worked to get a better job so that I could have more time for myself and my family.




3. I'm a hobbyist photographer; granted I'm pretty involved but still a hobbyist.
   
   
   
   • I'm not looking for legitimacy. Other family members are impressed because of the household names that I'd be shooting for their catalogs & websites. I think its easier for some people to explain the kind of money or time I put into this hobby if I have some "legitimate" job attached to it. This isn't me. I don't mind telling people that photography is completely a way in which I try to find some expression of myself and what I see. So people look at me weird when they see that I use better equipment than they do in their own photo studio. I don't care. This is about me finding some artistic expression. It's my bass boat, hunting trips and little red hot rod all rolled into one.
   
   
   • Any time I spend shooting for pay takes away from the time I have to shoot artistically
   
   
   
   

Pros:

1. I don't shoot often enough now and this would give me some structured time where I'd be expected to shoot and produce quality output


2. I could work a relatively small amount of time and pickup some cash on the side (photography is a relatively expensive hobby)


3. I could gain experience with my camera in controlled lighting setting


4. It does yield some legitimacy to my investment in photography

Well, there you have it. Guess when it all boils down to it I just need to make a decision.

Thanks for reading,

Kev