Monday, August 25, 2003

Lunchtime post

What to blog today.

I ate at my desk and just decided to go ahead and blog something before I got back to the grindstone. But what to blog.

OK. Last night I watched the Mind of the Married Man on HBO. I like this series. It's a show that depicts a married man and his interactions with his wife, his co-workers and his friends. I couldn't tell you the name of any of the characters on the show but its pretty darned accurate. So last night dude's wife sets up and eye test at the optometrist. The doctor is no doctor. She's a female doctor and a classic beauty to boot. You can see his comfort level get tagged about 0.003 seconds after she walks in the room and his libido starts screaming, "Hey, she's totally doable!!" He makes the mistake of telling his friends and they all schedule time to get their eyes checked. Now his personal little battleground of lust vs disconnected observation has become overlain with the multiple levels of desire shown in his friends. In my experience, this demonstrates a mostly male encumberance: that of openly leering at women with friends or making jokes about how attractive women are but then playing demure towards women when the wife is around. He tries to walk this tightrope by not engaging with the guys on the topic of how hot the doctor is but then his wife shows up downtown and mentions that he needs some certificate from the doctor's office and she wants to go with him to pick it up and then get some lunch. Whoa!! My wife meeting a woman that I not only find attractive, I shared that with the guys?!? No way!!! Can't happen!! My worlds can't collide. Of course, she picks up on that and asks what's up so in the heat of the discussion he asks just how much she wants to "know him" (one of her earlier comments about the depth of their relationship). She says that she wants to hear it and then immediately follows it up with "Are you having an affair?" "Nope" "Fooling around?" "No way!" Now see, this just demonstrates what little bit women understand about men. If a man is having an affair or even just stepping all on the line with some flirty touches or suggestive discussion, he's not going to start by asking how much you want to know. He'll keep that little tidbit to himself, hoping that he can have his cake and eat it too. He isn't going to volunteer that he's completely undermined your trust. If a man starts off with "So do you really want to know me? Want to know what I'm dealing with?" Guess what. He's about to open up and show you that he does actually deal with gray areas where he's not sure of the lines and the definitions and that you aren't the only one that doesn't know everything that's happening or how to define it. Some men want to share an honest, open relationship with one woman. But don't think it'll always be neat and tidy. Sometimes we guys are trying to balance the claxon shouts of NOW advocates that say, "Women are exactly the same as men." with the siren softness of hair rinse commercials that show us that women are WAAAYYY different from guys (at least physically).

As one member (pardon the pun) of the male gender of our species, accept it when I say that I love women. I love their bodies, their minds, their jokes and I love that I don't get them. I love that I don't understand their motivations or their desires. From the tips of their lovely little toes to the split ends of their luxuriously long, vibrantly highlighted hair. I just find women to be incredible. Smart ones that challenge my mind and pretty ones that uplift my hindbrain. So many things about any woman can turn me on and pique my interest. However, after seeing women all my life, I only want to be intimate with one. You're all great and sexy and any one could be cool to work through life with but I've found someone that I enjoy fitting into life with. Some other universe might see an alternate me hitting stuff like a six-year-old with an unlimited rides ticket at Disney but in this one, I only want to share my thoughts and life with one woman. I'm sure its difficult to tell us apart and no one gets the "see into the future" card so that you know if the one you're with is a dog or not. All I can say is that as confusing as life is, I like a show that presents some of the conflicts that I live through as people hear some of my comments about women and automatically assume I'm the worst kind of man. So I admit that I find someone attractive. Big deal.



On a separate note, I got my Canon 50mm prime. It is f/1.8 (very fast and very bright lens) and I still haven't shot it yet. I have a photoshoot in Knoxville tomorrow and I hope to get some usage out of it then. I'll post here when I have some updated pics for your perusal.

On DPC I got my highest rating so far - 5.95. Just 5 100th's of a point from 6. I placed 44th out of about 150 pics so that's the top third. I'm pretty happy with that. I'm starting to notice my basic photography skills have improved. I can handhold shots that are about 200mm or less and I generally frame them better than when I started but I'm still not composing compelling stories in my lens. The next contest is Tools and I think I should try some new compositions with my props at home (the backgrounds and colored sheets. This is a member challenge so we probably won't have 150 entries this time again. Maybe I can shoot for the top 25. It'll take some creativity and some work with PS to produce something that breaks into this rarified air but I'm up for it. We'll see in about a week how I do.

Thanks for stopping by.

Kev

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